Would you like some fruit with those bowl(ed)s?
A fixture change due to the Chiltern Crusaders being unable to field a team.

I expect it’s due to the kind of crusading that has them chaining themselves to some trees or digging a bunker under Wendover in an attempt to stop HS2 (or HS Boo as we like champagne socialists like to call it), I do recall their number 4 bat being called S.W. Ampy…

The gentlemen from Bovingdon St George stepped up to replace the Crusaders, for which we owe them a vote of thanks. This is a team we know well, some of us better than others. Raheel, (not playing today) and Yusuf (who was man enough to play) turning out for BStG on Saturdays.

Rex Albert joined our merry band, Tony (Tony’s wife Liz really) scouting him out for us. The Iceman slid back in for his first game of the season. We also welcomed the return of liberal politics to the village with a new Lib Dem MP elected only two days previous, we should have started with a rendition of the Red Flag but no one knew the second verse.

Laos has its Plain of Jars, Los Angeles the Hollywood Bowl, now Great Missenden has The Field of Bowleds. Not the trait usually associated with GMPCC (but could apply to the opposition, St George and all that), nor the white powder you use to give you a ‘touch of freshness’ but as in wickets castled, cartwheeled, destroyed, upset, disturbed…

The GStB openers put on 64 and after that there was a steady fall of wickets. A. Ellis top scored for BStG with 82. Wickets were shared, sort of, 3 for Rags, 2 each for Sir Anger and Nic, Rex, the Skipper, Tiger and Yusuf having no luck. We look forward to more of Rex’s bowling, we just need to check the wicket is the correct length!

This lack of need for intervention from the fielders meant there is little material in terms of mishaps to make this report tastier.

Gray’s (sic) Anatomy

Opening for the home team was Iceman and Nic. Grey described the weather, the players hair and the progress made chasing the 182 set by BStG. Nic was first man out after the Skipper pointed out that the innings was already ¼ the way through and we were behind the rate. I think Nic was stupefied by the Skipper’s ability to work outside of his 10x tables and that led him to play a yeehaa to the next ball and to be bowled.

The opening experiment I think is over, not all Kiwis can be winners.

Wickets fell fairly regularly. Amit got a start but a mini collapse ensued. Yusuf got a first baller from the BStG spinner and Niron and Rupert were back in the clubhouse soon after. Rags, Rex and Suranga pushed the score along. Rex smacked a 6. Rags and Suranga a few 4s. Tiger hit his obligatory boundary and that brought our cack-handed slugger to the crease. Toobes got to 10 and then played the wrong shot to a full toss and was well caught to end the GMPCC innings at 131.

We speak at length about cricket being a fickle mistress and a game of ‘what ifs’. We also refer to the book and what is contained within to illustrate settle the issues/of the points on contention.

Toobes may say it was a no ball, as may Suranga but in the book it says out, caught. The umpire at the bowler’s end looked to his colleague for a judgement and with none forthcoming made no moves to change the fairness of the delivery.

‘Some days diamonds, some days stones’ – John Denver.

This was Rupert’s last game before heading North of the border. All the Pelicans wish him well in the land of shortbread and Arbroath Smokies and look forward to seeing him again soon in the Valley of the Bowleds.

Reports are intended to convey an entertaining picture of the day’s play. No disrespect is meant, but if on occasion we misjudge matters, please take it in the friendly and humorous spirit in which it is intended.